Why do golfers wear two pairs of trousers?
In case they get a hole in one!
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An amateur golfer is one who addresses the ball twice: once before swinging, and once again after swinging.
Q:Why is basketball the grossest sport there is?
A:Because they dribble all over the court.
Paddy asks Murphy, 'Why do scuba divers fall off their boats backwards?"
Murphy replies, "If they fell forwards they'd still be on the f*cking boat!"
What season is it when you are on a trampoline?
Spring time.
Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics...
In the summer.
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A golfer tried three straight times to hit a golf ball over the inlet of water between him and the green.
But each time the ball splashes into the drink.
In utter frustration the golfer said, "Caddie, take my clubs on in, I'm going to jump into the water and drown myself."
The caddie replied, "I doubt that, sir. You couldn't keep your head down long enough to drown!"
During preseason training, a college football lineman married one of the team's cheerleaders.
The coach was a bit surprised and remarked to his star football player, "You are such a big, burley guy.
Why in the world did you marry such a tiny, petite woman?
She is no bigger than your hand."
"That's right, Coach," replied the lineman.
"But, she's much better!"
My wife said, "I can think of 14 reasons to leave you, plus your obsession with Tennis!"
I replied, "That's 15 love!"
Q: What is a sheep's favorite sport?
A: Baaasket baaall!
After a 2 year study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on America's ball-related recreational preferences:
The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is basketball.
The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling.
The sport of choice for blue-collar workers is football.
The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball.
The sport of choice for middle management is tennis.
The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf.
Conclusion: The higher you rise in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
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