Joke #11621

Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true.
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has 36.64 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: new year, poems, winter

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To the tune of "Walking in a Winter Wonderland": Dog tags ring, are you listening'? In the lane, snow is glistening. It's yellow, not white I've been there tonight, Marking up my winter wonderland. Smell that tree? That's my fragrance. It's a sign for wandering vagrants; "Avoid where I pee, it's my property. Marked up as my winter wonderland." In the meadow dad will build a snowman, following the classical design. Then I'll lift my leg and let it go, man, So all the world will know it's mine-mine-mine! Straight from me to the fence post, flows my natural incense boast, "Stay off of my turf, this small piece of earth, I mark it as my winter wonderland."
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has 57.49 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, dog, poems, winter
Q: What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby's crib? A: A snowmobile!
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: baby, wife, winter
Q: What's the forecast for New Year's Eve? A: Mostly drunk with a slight chance of passing out.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: drunk, new year, time
On New Year's Eve, Marilyn stood up in the local pub and said that it was time to get ready. At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living. Well, it was kind of embarrassing. As the clock struck, the bartender was almost crushed to death.
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has 80.43 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, life, new year, time
A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.
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has 75.00 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: new year, time
Q: Why do more niggers get hit by cars in the winter? A: They're easier to spot.
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has 64.64 % from 253 votes. More jokes about: black people, car, racist, vulgar, winter
A drunk man comes inside a bar and says, "Happy New Year everybody." and the waiter says, "We are in June you drunk man." And the drunk man says, "Oh my god my wife is going to kill me I have never been so late in my life!"
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has 66.49 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, drunk, new year, wife
A javelin thrower called Vicky Found the grip of her javelin sticky. When it came to the throw She couldn't let go. Making judging the distance quite tricky.
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has 37.02 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: athlete, poems
I like your style I like your class but most of all i like your ass.
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has 63.74 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, poems
Did you hear about the two dumb blonds who went two the drive in theater and froze two death they went two see closed for the winter?
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, death, stupid, winter