Joke #9670

Chuck starts the new year by roundhouse kicking the old one.
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During vacation my front door's open and I left a note saying "This house is protected by Chuck Norris 3 days a week you guess which 3." All was good.
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My New Year's resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year's resolutions.
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A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.
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PlayStation network was never hacked. Chuck Norris just decided to play one day.
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If your born in September, its pretty safe to assume your parents started out the New Year with a Bang!
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When Chuck Norris eats dinner at a restaurant, the wait staff tips him.
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A Senator in the USA was once asked about his attitude toward whisky. "If you mean the demon drink that poisons the mind, pollutes the body, desecrates family life, and inflames sinners, then I'm against it. But if you mean the elixir of a New Year toast, the shield against winter chill, the taxable potion that puts needed funds into public coffers to comfort little crippled children, then I'm for it. This is my position, and I will not compromise."
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Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true.
Vote: has 41.82 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
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