Joke #11879

Q: Where do Snowmen go to dance? A: To snowballs.
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has 63.12 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: winter

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Teacher: "Who knows what is a difference between a snowman and snowwoman?" Little Johnny: "Three snowballs!"
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has 73.41 % from 171 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, little Johnny, teacher, winter
Q: What did the snowman order at McDonalds ? A: Icerbergers with chilly sauce!
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: food, winter
A little bird was flying south for the Winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. Morals of the story: 1. Not everyone who sh*ts on you is your enemy. 2. Not everyone who gets you out of sh*t is your friend. 3. And when you're in deep sh*t, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
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has 78.20 % from 132 votes. More jokes about: bird, friendship, life, winter
Q: What does Frosty's wife put on her face at night? A: Cold cream!
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: beauty, wife, winter
Obama and his generals in the Pentagon discussed, and they could not agree on, what is the best time for the assault on Russia. Finally, they decide to ask the French: "When is it best to invade Russia?" The French answered: "We do not know, but certainly not in the winter, it would go wrong for sure." Therefore, it would probably be better to ask the Germans: "When is it best to invade Russia?" The Germans answer: "We do not know, but it certainly would not be in the summer. We have tried, already..." What to do? Someone proposes to ask China that is progressive and always comes up with a new idea. So they asked the Chinese, "When is the best time to invade Russia?" The Chinese replies: "Right now!" Russia began to build "The Strength of Siberia" pipeline, "Turkish stream", The Spaceport "Vostochny", The Bridge to the Crimea, and in the near future they will modernize the BAM, they are building new sports complexes for the World Cup in football and athletics, they are planning oil extraction in the Arctic... Right now they do need a lot of POW as work force.
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has 52.92 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: ethnic, political, war, winter, work
Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.
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has 32.17 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, morbid, sport, winter
The Winter Olympics. Letting white people win at sports no one else can afford to learn.
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has 79.02 % from 1242 votes. More jokes about: racist, sport, white people, winter
My mother has painted a picture with such cold colours that if I want to take a look at it closely, I must have an anorak, the gloves, the winter cap and a scarf on, not to freeze.
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has 53.58 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: family, winter
Q: What's the difference between an iceberg and a clothes brush? A: One crushes boats and the other brushes coats!
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has 59.75 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: travel, winter
Q: Where does a snowman keep his money? A: In a snow bank.
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has 56.75 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: money, winter