Q: How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb? A: Just one, but millions volunteered to get rid of anything dark
Q: Did you hear that the White House isn't displaying it's Nativity scene this year? A: They couldn't find the three wise men!
If you give three liberals a light bulb what would happen? The first one would say its causing global warming. The second one would say its racist. The third one would say its not a light bulb unless Obama says let there be light.
Q: How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb? A: Three. One to hire a Mexican guy and two to deport him when he's done.
Q: In what way are Democrats more generous than Republicans? A: Unlike Republicans, Democrats are not only generous with their own money, but also with other people's money.
Q: When will scientists cure the common cold? A: Actually, they already did but Republican pharmacists won't dispense it because they mistook it for birth control.
Q: How do you keep a Republican busy for a week? A: Turn on the spell checker.
Q: What do you call a Republican politician who hasn't been connected to a gay sex scandal? A: Due.
Q: How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 200. Ten to attach the bulb to the sun, and 190 to make the sun revolve around the Earth.
You will never see a car worth over $10,000 with an Obama sticker on the back.
A Liberal found a magic genie's lamp and rubbed it. The genie said, "I will grant you one wish." He said, "I wish I were smarter". So the genie made him a Republican.