I just recently discovered that there is a national holiday named after Atheism. April FOOLS day. Like this story in the name of Jesus.
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April doesn't fool Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris fools April.
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Q: How do we know Peter was a rich fisherman?
AA By his net income.
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You are so old, you sat next to Jesus in school.
Change the coffee in the office coffee maker to decaf.
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A woman stopped by our customer-service desk and asked me for a copy of the book that has Jesus in it.
After much back-and-forth, I determined that she wanted the Bible.
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She showed me a piece of paper with the title written on it: Thesaurus.
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Q: What animal could Noah not trust?
A: Cheetah.
A lawyer and the pope were both killed in an accident.
The two were in line to see St. Peter at the Pearly Gates.
St. Peter asked the lawyer his name and looked it up in his book.
He then asked the Pope for his name and looked it up in his book also.
"Now, if you will come with me, I will show you your eternal dwellings," said St. Peter.
They walked along the clouds and came to a huge mansion with all sorts of lavish trappings.
St. Peter turned to the lawyer and told him this was to be his house.
The Pope, knowing how important he was to the church could hardly imagine what his house would be like.
St. Peter and the Pope continued on to a small, beat-up wooden shack.
St. Peter told the Pope that this would be his dwelling.
The Pope, shocked, said to St. Peter, "Just a minute!"
That other guy was a lawyer and he gets a mansion.
I was the head of the Roman Catholic church, and this is all the reward I get?"
St. Peter looked at the Pope and said "True, you have done great things. But we have lots of Popes in Heaven, and that guy was the first lawyer ever to make it up here."