Joke #11810

As a child, I was afreid of ghosts. As I grew up, I realised people are more scary.
Vote:
has 59.93 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, ugly, vulgar

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, 'Dad'. With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands: "Dear, Dad. It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mum and you. I've been finding real passion with Stacy. She is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing's, tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am. But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so that Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it! Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your many grandchildren. Love, your son, Joshua. P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table. Call when it is safe for me to come home!"
Vote:
has 84.14 % from 733 votes. More jokes about: kids, life, relationship, school, vulgar
An ugly, fat, bad woman with two kids enters Wal Mart, shouting angry at the kids with no reason. The man at the reception says cheerfully to her: "Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Cute kids! Are they twins?" The horrible woman stopped shouting, just enough to say, "Hell, they’ re not twins… The older is 9 and the other is 7! Are you blind or just stupid?" "No madam... I’m neither blind nor stupid... I just can’t get that there’s a man out there who had sex with you twice."
Vote:
has 82.82 % from 588 votes. More jokes about: fat, kids, stupid, ugly, women
Yo momma so ugly she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back.
Vote:
has 82.28 % from 7759 votes. More jokes about: insulting, ugly, Yo mama
Yo mama's so fat when she stepped on a scale it said: "A.B.C.D.E.F.G get your fat ass off of me."
Vote:
has 80.37 % from 159 votes. More jokes about: communication, fat, insulting, vulgar, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her imaginary friend played with other kids.
Vote:
has 80.26 % from 776 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, ugly, Yo mama
During a lesson little Johnny yawns extremely wide. Teacher tries to make a joke: "Johnny, don't swallow me." He replies: "Don't worry, teacher, I don't eat pork."
Vote:
has 79.81 % from 143 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, little Johnny, teacher, vulgar
Your mama is so ugly, that she made a blind kid cry.
Vote:
has 79.79 % from 2416 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, Yo mama
Yo mama so ugly, even hello kitty said goodbye.
Vote:
has 78.85 % from 445 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kitty, ugly, Yo mama
"Madam, your son just called me an ugly swine!" The mother apologizes shamefacedly, "I'm so sorry, I must have told him like a thousand times it is wrong to judge people just from how they look..."
Vote:
has 77.37 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, ugly, vulgar
Yo mama so ugly people dress up as her for Halloween!
Vote:
has 76.10 % from 219 votes. More jokes about: Halloween, insulting, ugly, Yo mama