Joke #1184

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera? Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
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has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: men

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Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
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has 81.73 % from 246 votes. More jokes about: light bulb, men, work
A man consulted his priest about getting a divorce. The priest was surprised. "Why on earth would you want to divorce such a lovely wife? She is soft and gentle and, if I may say so, she is also quite beautiful and nicely proportioned. I really can’t see what you have to complain about." The man took off his shoe. "See this shoe," he said, showing it to the priest, "The leather is soft and gentle. It is a beautiful piece of work and nicely proportioned." "Ah"” said the priest, "a parable." "In a way, Father," replied the man. "I’m the only one who knows it pinches."
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has 69.86 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: divorce, love, men, priest, wife
A man was digging a ditch, when he uncovered a lamp. When he brushed it off, a genie popped out, and said "To show my gratitude for releasing me, I'll grant you one wish.." The man thought for a second, reached into his pocket, pulled out a map of the world, pointed to the Middle-East, and replied "I want you to bring peace to this area." "Ooooh...I'm so sorry, that's impossible" said the genie. "There's absolutely no way I could accomplish such a great feat, so you'll have to choose another wish..." The man then said "Well...then how about having my wife give me oral-sex voluntarily...?" The genie thought for a minute, then said "Can I see that map again..?"
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: men
A man goes into a florist and says, "I want to buy some flowers for my girlfriend". "Certainly sir", she responds, "and what in particular are you after"? After some thought, the man answers, "a shag".
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has 74.97 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love, men, relationship, sex
Why does a man like love at first sight? It saves them a lot of time.
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has 33.37 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: love, men, time
One spelling mistake can destroy your life! A husband wrote a message to his wife on his official trip and forgot to add 'e' at the end of a word: "I am having such a wonderful time! Wish you were her..!"
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has 24.40 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: husband, life, men, wife
"I can't wait for Father's Day" said no man ever.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, men
How can you tell if a man is happy? Who cares?
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has 76.99 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: men
What does a man call true love? An erection.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
What do you call a handcuffed man? Trustworthy.
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has 28.61 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men