Joke #11881

Q: What are the hottest days during summer? A: Sun-days
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: weather

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Lightning doesn't strike Chuck Norris, chuck norris strikes lightning!
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It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
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Q: How did the hail stone describe its life? A: It really has a lot of ups and downs.
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While vacationing in a remote area of Alaska, I met an old mountain man, wise in the ways one need be to live in an extreme wilderness area like he did. I asked him about the weater, did it rain a lot? He said; "See those mountains over there" and he pointed to them." I replied, "Yes." "Well," he replied, ".. if you can't see those mountains, that means it's raining. If you can see them, that means it's going to rain."
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A guy buys his first motorcycle. The dealer tells him to keep a jar of Vaseline handy to rub on the chrome before it rains to prevent rusting. A few months later, the young man's girlfriend invites him to dinner at her parents' house. Before they go in, she explains their family tradition that whomever speaks first after dinner must do the dishes. After dinner, everyone sits in silence waiting for the first person to break. After 15 minutes, the young man decides to speed things up. He leans over and kisses his woman in front of her family. No one says a word. Emboldened, he throws her on the table and has sex with her. Silence. Desperate, he grabs her mother and has sex with her on the table. Suddenly, they hear thunder rumble in the distance. The guy thinks of his bike and, instinctively, pulls the jar of Vaseline out of his pocket. "OK, OK," says the father, "I'll do the dishes!"
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has 59.81 % from 200 votes. More jokes about: dad, family, marriage, sex, weather
Every time Chuck Norris farts a hurricane forms.
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What is the similarities between a black girl, and a tornado? They both suck, blow, and leave you homeless!
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has 73.25 % from 486 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, weather
Chuck Norris has sneezing allergies in the mid-to-late fall. This time is typically referred to as hurricane season.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, weather
Go to your back door and look for the dog. If the dog is at the door and he is wet, it's probably raining. But if the dog is standing there really soaking wet, it is probably raining really hard. If the dog's fur looks like it's been rubbed the wrong way, it's probably windy. If the dog has snow on his back, it's probably snowing. Of course, to be able to tell the weather like this, you have to leave the dog outside all the time, especially if you expect bad weather. Yours sincerely,  The CAT
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has 57.35 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, weather
Q: What do women, tornadoes and hurricanes have in common? A: They all get the house.
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has 54.80 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: marriage, weather, women