Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are on the same plane. The plane crashes. Who survives?
America.
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Starbucks is offering a new drink to honor Nancy Pelosi.
They call it the "fullacrapuccino".
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Yo mama's so dumb, she thinks socialism means partying!
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No one's afraid to criticize the US President, but no one even dares to say one bad thing about Chuck Norris...
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How did Barack propose to Michelle?
He got on one knee, pulled out a ring, and said "I don't wanna be obamaself."
Q: In what way are Democrats more generous than Republicans?
A: Unlike Republicans, Democrats are not only generous with their own money, but also with other people's money.
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Q: What do you call a pothead that doesn't inhale?
A: Mr. President.
Q: Have you heard about McDonald's new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.
At a Whitehouse party for past presidents.
Michelle Obama caught Barron Trump making faces at Sasha.
Michelle walked over to reprimand the child and said, "Barron, when I was a little girl, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that."
Baron looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Obama, you can't say you weren't warned."
Three boys walk through the woods and suddenly hear cries for help.
They follow the sound to the lake and see George W. Bush drowning.
The boys jump into the water and drag him to shore.
Bush asks the boys how he can repay them.
The first boy says, "I want a boat."
The second boy says, "I want a truck."
The third boy says, "I want a nice tombstone."
Bush asks, "Why is that?"
The boy says, "Because when my dad finds out I helped save you, he's going to kill me."
Chuck Norris was asked if he would be running for President, after a chuckle, he stated, nothing makes him run.
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