Q: How do tax accountants make a bold fashion statement?
A: Wear their dark grey socks instead of the light grey.
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A woman walks into her accountant’s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.
The accountant says, “Before we begin, I’ll need to ask a few questions.”
He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, “What is your occupation?”
The woman replies, “I’m a whore.”
The accountant balks and says, “No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. Let’s try to rephrase that.”
The woman, “Ok, I’m a prostitute.”
“No, that is still too crude. Try again.”
They both think for a minute, then the woman states, “I’m a chicken farmer.”
The accountant asks, “What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore or a prostitute?”
“Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year.”
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A fine is a tax for doing wrong.
A tax is a fine for doing well.
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Accountant after reading a nursery rhyme to his child,"No, son. It wouldn't be tax deductible when Little Bo Peep loses her sheep. But I like your thinking."
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Q: How do you know you've got a good tax accountant?
A: He's had a loophole named after him.
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Where do homeless accountants live?
In a tax shelter.
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Q: Who makes the best detective - Sherlock Holmes or a tax accountant?
A: The tax accountant - she make's more deductions.
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Q: And the difference between tax avoidance and tax evasion?
A: Jail.
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Did you hear about the cannibal Tax Accountant?
She charges an arm and a leg.
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Q: What is the definition of an extroverted tax accountant?
A: Someone who stares at YOUR shoes when talking to you.
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How do you know you have a great CPA?
He has a tax loophole named after him.
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