Q: What has 18 legs and catches flies?
A: A baseball team.
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What does NBA stand for Niggas Boucing Around.
A drunk guy in Alaska decides to go ice fishing.
He starts sawing a hole in the ice, when a loud booming voice says, "You will find no fish there."
The drunk looks up, ignores it, and continues on.
The voice booms again, "You will find no fish under the ice."
The drunk looks up and says, "God, is that you?"
The voice says, "No, I'm the manager of this ice rink."
What season is it when you are on a trampoline?
Spring time.
Coach: Your roommate and the captain of the team reported that you have many bad words for me in your sleep!
So do you abuse me in your sleep!
Football Player: Coach, It is just not true!
Coach: What is not true, I trust the captain and I am asking this in front of him!
Football player: Coach, It is untrue that I was sleeping!
What can you serve that you cannot eat?
A tennis ball.
Yo mama so fat when she went swimming, The Japanese harpooned her and took her back to Japan to sell her blubber.
It's game 7 of the NBA finals and a man makes his way to his seat at center court.
He sits down and notices that the seat next to him is empty.
He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone is sitting there.
He responds, "No, the seat's empty."
"The first man exclaims, "What?!?
Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the NBA finals and not use it?"
The neighbor responds, "Well the seat is mine, but my wife passed away and this is the first NBA finals we haven't been together."
The first man responds," I'm sorry to hear that.
Wasn't there anyone else, a friend or relative, that could've taken that seat?" The neighbor responds, "No, they're all at the funeral."
Chuck Norris became famous when he coached the American rugby and America won the fifa world cup.
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The water in Rio is so bad that even Usain Bolt had the "runs" in his last race!