Joke #12805

Q: What does an SEO and part-time chiropractor work on? A: Your bad backlinks.
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has 66.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: geek, internet, IT, technology, work

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Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?" The Engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer enquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" And the interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."
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has 85.45 % from 295 votes. More jokes about: IT, money, office, work
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "Great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
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has 85.19 % from 418 votes. More jokes about: coding, computer, IT, technology
Algorithm. Word used by programmers when they don't want to explain what they did.
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has 84.37 % from 164 votes. More jokes about: coding, geek, IT, programmer, work
A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen". The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them". Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".
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has 84.14 % from 787 votes. More jokes about: computer, IT, technology, wife, winter
Programmer. A machine that turns coffee into code.
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has 83.90 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: coding, geek, IT, programmer, work
The 21st century: Deleting history is more important than making it.
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has 83.08 % from 365 votes. More jokes about: computer, history, IT, technology
Programmer. A person who fixed a problem that you don't know you have, in a way you don't understand.
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has 82.65 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: coding, computer, geek, IT, programmer
Here is an actual list of aircraft problems reported by pilots at the end of the day for the mechanics to fix before takeoff the next day followed by the notes the mechanics left for the pilots to read the next morning. (P) Left inside main tire almost needs replacement (S) Almost replaced left inside main tire (P) Something loose in cockpit (S) Something tightened in cockpit (P) Evidence of leak on right main landing gear (S) Evidence removed (P) DME volume unbelievably loud (S) Volume set to more believable level (P) Number three engine missing (S) Engine found on right wing after brief search
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has 81.92 % from 141 votes. More jokes about: air force, mechanic, technology, work
The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong.
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has 81.84 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: coding, geek, IT
Daddy, how was I born? Ah, very well, one day you need to find out anyway! Mom and Dad got together in a chat room. Dad set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber cafe. We snuck into a secluded room, and then your mother downloaded from your dad's memory stick. As soon as dad was ready for an upload, it was discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall. Since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later the blessed virus appeared. And that's the story.
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has 81.32 % from 482 votes. More jokes about: family, geek, IT, kids