Joke #1300

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"
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has 57.73 % from 182 votes. More jokes about: black people, drunk

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The policeman had the bar under surveillance a few minutes before closing time, so he could see who comes out drunk. The first one out the door at 2:00 o'clock weaved down the sidewalk, then fell on the curb. Sluggishly got up, then tried his keys in five cars before finding his own car. Once inside his car, he fumbled with his keys for 2 or 3 minutes. Meanwhile, all the club patrons had gotten into their cars and driven away, leaving this one fellow quite alone in the parking lot. Finally, he got his car started and began to very slowly drive away. Immediately, the police car was behind him with lights flashing. The policeman asked the man to take a breathalyser test, to which he readily agreed. When the reading was 0.0%, the policeman said, "How can this be?" To which the man replied, "Because tonight, I'm the designated decoy."
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has 83.15 % from 294 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, cop, drunk, time
Q: What did the little black kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.
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has 72.38 % from 264 votes. More jokes about: black people, Christmas, kids, mean
Why are niggers like sperm? Only 1 in a Million actually works.
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has 57.67 % from 422 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, work
A drunk man comes inside a bar and says, "Happy New Year everybody." and the waiter says, "We are in June you drunk man." And the drunk man says, "Oh my god my wife is going to kill me I have never been so late in my life!"
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has 65.86 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, drunk, new year, wife
A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to another man in the bar: "Why don't you be a good Samaritan and take him home." The man takes the drunk out the door and to his car and he stumbles at least ten times. They drive along and the drunk points out his house to the man. He stops the car and the drunk stumbles up the steps to his house with the man. The drunk's wife greets them at the door: "Why thank you for bringing him home for me, but where's his wheel chair?"
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, car, drunk
Q: What do you call a black and white thing rolling down a hill A: A maori and a segull fighting over a fishhead.
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has 28.86 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: animal, black people, racist, white people
In South Africa a nigger was walking with a parrot on his shoulder and on his way he meets with a white guy. He is so cute! Does he speak? Asks the white guy. I don’t know I just bought him! Says the parrot.
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has 37.64 % from 101 votes. More jokes about: black people, parrot
A man enters a store and says: "15 litres of wine please." "Did you bring a container for this? " "You're speaking to it."
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has 76.51 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, drunk, men, wine
Q: How many niggers does it take to change a light bulb? A: There are no light bulbs in Africa.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
Q: What do you call a white guy who needs to go somewhere across town but does not own an automobile? A: A taxi.
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has 66.03 % from 647 votes. More jokes about: black people, car, white people, work