Q: Why did Humpty Dumpty sit on the wall?
A: Because he wanted a photograph with Pink Floyd!
Q: And why did Humpty Dumpty have a big fall?
A: Because Pink Floyd did not turn up!
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Chuck Norris once stood on a bridge in London.
Then they wrote a song about it.
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10 things men don't say
1)Let's watch Lifetime.
2)Sex is overrated.
3)I don't want to go too far on the first date.
4)Yes, your sister does have bigger breasts than you.
5)Don't we owe your mother a visit?
6)I'm relieved I don't have a large penis weighing me down.
7)Dessert goes right to my hips.
8)I hate when I miss Oprah.
9)Does this suit make me look fat?
10)I'll never get tired of listening to Dido.
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Did you hear about that music composer who commited suicide?
He didn't even leave a note.
What do the spice girls and a pack of M+Ms have in common?
There are assorted colors, but they all taste the same.
Yo mama's so fat, she walked across the dance-floor...and the band skipped!
What do cows call Frank Sinatra?
Old Moo Eyes.
Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette.
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What do you call it when Miley Cyrus falls down?
Hoe-Down.
Chuck Norris' guitar amp goes up to 12.
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Freds voice is high because Chuck Norris kicked him in the nuts.
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