Music teacher tells Peter:
"I warn you, if you will not behave, as appropriate, I tell your parents that you have a talent for music."
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Q: Why was the guitar teacher arrested?
A: For fingering a minor.
A kindergarten teacher spent a few minutes each morning teaching a new word to her class.
She would tell the class the word and its meaning, then ask them to come up with a few sentences that included the word for the day.
One day, the teacher said that the word for the day was "frugal."
She explained that frugal had to do with saving, and a frugal person is one who saves.
She then asked the class to come up with a sentence for the word.
The class seemed kind of stumped, and sat there in silence for a few seconds until one little girl raised her hand.
Instead of just a sentence, she came up with a little story:
"There once was a princess who was stuck in a tall tower.
There was a spell on all of the doors, so she couldn’t get out.
One day, she heard a young prince who was walking by and singing.
The princess called out of the tower, 'Frugal me! Frugal me!'
So, the prince frugaled her and they lived happily ever after."
What is a teacher's favorite kind of music?
Class-ical.
Yo mama is so stupid that when a teacher told the class nobody is perfect, he replied, "I want to become nobody!"
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Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.
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Teacher: "Alex, stop showing off. Do you think you are the teacher of this class?"
Alex: "No, Miss."
Teacher: "Then stop acting like a fool!"
Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing.
"Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas carols."
"Thats nice of you, Alfie," she replied, "but why?"
Alfie replied, "Because then I'd only have to hear your voice once a year!"
Q: How do 5 gay men walk?
A: One Direction!
When I graduated from highschool, I was so poor and couldn't afford college.
So my parents sent me to dog training school.
I learned a lot when I was there.
Sit, stay, roll over.
I haven't quite got the fetching part down.
They say I'm a little rough around the edges.
Ozzy Ozbourne once bit the head off a bat. Not one to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off Batman!
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