Q: What sports team is the least safe around children?
A: The Nashville Predators.
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Yo mama so fat when she went sky diving in a blue jump suit, all the kids below said, "Ahhhh! The sky is falling!"
Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: They don't know where home is.
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Q: What is a banana's favorite gymnastic move?
A: The splits!
Q: What's the difference between an NFL player and an elevator?
A: The elevator can raise a child.
What’s a swimmer’s favourite sport?
Pool.
Once upon a time there was a women that was about to have triplets.
In her stomach the babies were talking to each other.
The first baby says "I want to be a plumber, because there is so much water in here".
The second baby says "I want to be an electrician because it is so dark in here".
And the last baby says "I want to be a hunter, because if that damn snake comes back in here i'm going to cut it off".
I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with her fitness trainer.
Me: "Okay, this isn't working out."
Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.
Squash
There was a boy and his mother was about to go to work.
She said, "Do not open the door for nobody".
The boy said, "Okay."
So after the mother left a girl came to their house and she said to the boy, "Let me in."
The boy said, "I don’t want to, maybe tomorrow”"
So the girl went to the window and started knocking on it.
Once again she said, "Let me in."
The boy finally gave up and let her in.
So once she got in she said, "Let’s go upstairs."
The boy said, "I don’t want to, maybe tomorrow."
The girl kept asking him so he finally gave up.
When his mama came into his room she said, "Get off that girl."
The boy said, "I don’t want to, maybe tomorrow!"