Joke #3646

It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No" says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?" The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley Cup we haven't been to together since we got married." "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. That's terrible... But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The man shakes his head. "No,” he says. “They're all at the funeral."
Vote: has 19.47 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from Grandma have in common? You don't look down.
Vote: has 67.31 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, dirty, old people, sport
Billionaire Richard Branson has withdrawn from a sponsorship deal of Chesterfield Football Club. He stated that 'he couldnt have the name VIRGIN on the teams shirts ... when they get fucked every week !'
Vote: has 70.43 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: football, sport
Chuck Norris walked his version of a 40-yard dash in 5.6 seconds; he was later told it was the Boston Marathon.
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport, time
My yoga instructor says I need to work on my breathing. But I mean, 41 years, still alive. I kinda got it.
Vote: has 65.48 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, life, sport
Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for the week preceding the exam and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And best of all, you can do these simple practice exercises right in the privacy of your own home. Exercise #1: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Repeat with the other breast. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again. Exercise #2 Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds. Do this again in case the last time wasn't effective enough. Then repeat with the other breast. Exercise #3 Visit your garage at 3 a.m. when the temperature of the concrete floor is just perfect. Take off all your warm clothes and lay comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until the breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast. CONGRATULATIONS! Now you are properly prepared for your mammogram.
Vote: has 35.23 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, sport, time, women
The computer programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball." Son: "Thank you, daddy, but where is the user's guide?"
Vote: has 54.66 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: computer, IT, programmer, sport
Q: What's the worst thing about being lonely? A: Playing Frisbee.
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: single, sport
What’s the difference between England and a tea bag? The tea bag stays in the cup longer. Basketball
Vote: has 17.55 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport
How did the blonde die icefishing? She got run over by the zamboni!
Vote: has 21.85 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport
Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport