What did O say to Q
Dude your dicks hanging out
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Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie - I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.
Q: What did one tampon say to the other?
A: Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches.
Q: What's long and hard and has cum in it?
A: Cucumber, dirty people.
A guy picks up a pr*stitute and proceeds to spend a couple of hours with her at a seedy motel.
A few days later, he finds that he has caught crabs.
He chases down the prostitute and says, "hey bitch, you gave me crabs".
She replies, "what'd you expect for ten bucks? Lobster?"
What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from Grandma have in common?
You don't look down.
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Q: How do the makers of Celebrex celebrate?
A: Fuck if I know
Walking home after a girls' night out, two women pass a graveyard and stop to pee.
The first woman has nothing to wipe with, so she uses her underwear and tosses it.
Her friend, however, finds a ribbon on a wreath, so she uses that.
The next day, the first woman's husband phones the second woman's husband, furious: "My wife came home last night without her panties!"
"That's nothing," says the other. "Mine came back with a card stuck between her butt cheeks that said, 'From all of us at the fire station, we'll never forget you.'"
Q: Why doesn't Smokey the bear have any kids?
A: Because every time his wife gets hot, he covers her with dirt and beats her with a shovel.
My favorite sexual position is called "The Osama"...
its where I burst into your room and blow a load on your face.
When you are in Hospital, your friends ask: "Hey, how are you dear?"
But your best friend ask: "Hey buddy, how is the nurse?"
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