What did the light bulb say to the switch?
You turn me on.
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Q: How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Hmmm... I'll just do a few numbers and get back to you.
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Q: How many nurses does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They just have a nursing student do it.
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A woman comes up to me and says, "Hey sexy you lost 185 lbs and now you have money."
"You wanna be my sugar daddy?"
"Nope I'm diabetic!"
How did the black guy escape from jail?
He unscrewed the light bulbs.
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Q:How many divorced men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:None, the sockets go with the house.
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Girl, do you need to get your protein macros up?
Because I'd gladly put my meat inside you.
Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: You wouldn't know, it's kind of an obscure number.
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How'd you like to go on a long romantic walk on the treadmill?
Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Depends on how clumsy you are.
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Q: How many Apple Iphone 6 early adopters does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 3001. 1 to do the work and 3000 to go online and bitch about the lack of obscure features!
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