Sometimes I wake up grumpy.
But other times I let her sleep in.
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
A lawyer trying to get tickets to a Broadway show, finally settled for a couple of seats a year in advance.
When the exciting night arrived and he sat down in his seat, a woman in front of the lawyer noticed the empty seat next to him and asked why such a valuable commodity was unused.
The lawyer replied that his wife couldn't make it.
The woman asked him if he didn't have relatives or friends who could have used the seat.
He replied, "Oh, they're all at the funeral."
Q: What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop?
A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Vote:
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
Why is a woman different from a PC?
A woman won't accept a 3½" floppy.
Q: Why do women wear black underwear?
A: They are mourning for the stiff they buried the night before.
Q: Why do women have 2% more brains then a cow?
A: So, when you pull their tits they won't shit on the floor.
Three women were debating about how wide their pussy are.
The first one said: "When my husband makes sex he puts his penis and his testicles in my pussy."
The second lady said: "Wooo when we are in bed my husband puts his hand and his arm in mine."
It was the turn of the third woman that pointed to her pussy and said: Jimy; Jimy come out, please."
Vote:
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
Q: What does a shot of Everclear and a Woman have in common?
A: Both of them make men start talking nonsense!