Joke #1440

Q: What's the difference between an epyleptic oyster shucker and a prostitute with diahrrea? A: One shucks between fits.
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has 34.70 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: disgusting

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Q: What did the butcher say when he backed into the meat-grinder? A: Looks like I'm getting a little behind in my work!
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has 44.46 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, work
Q: Why doesn't Tigger have any friends? A: He plays with Pooh.
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There was this man who had a dog. Every Sunday morning at 4:30 AM the man and the dog would go fishing. One day, the man fell in love and got married. After the wedding, when the man and the woman got in bed together, the man turned to the woman. "Tomorrow is Sunday and every Sunday morning, me and my dog go fishing at 4:30 AM. We'd like you to come along." "And what if I don't want to come along?" the woman asked impatiently. "Well then, sweetie, we'll just have to have buttsex." With that, the man rolled over and fell asleep, and left the woman pondering. "God, I hate having the buttsex, but I also hate getting up so early. I'll have to think about this more." In the morning, the woman could hear the man going downstairs to get the dog. It was much too early for the woman to get up so she decided to wait for the inevitable buttsex. She waited for about half an hour and fell back asleep, thinking her husband had left already. She awoke to the man, pulling on her arm. "Have you made your decision?" he asked "Yes," she replied. "I do not want to go fishing." True to his word, the man pulled down his pants. "By the way, what took you so long to come upstairs? It usually doesn't take that long to get Sparky up." "I know," the man said. "He didn't want to go either."
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has 72.01 % from 85 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, dog, fish, time
How is a soyburger like a dildo? They're both substitutes for meat.
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has 40.93 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, masturbation
What's the definition of bravery? A man with diarrhea chancing a fart!
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has 67.72 % from 167 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, health
What does Michael Jackson call a Tickle-Me-Elmo doll? Bait!
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has 20.85 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, music
One day in the city a bus driver was making his usual stops. At the first stop a woman came to the front of the bus to get off. She turned to the bus driver and said, "I think I was just molested back there." The bus driver looked at her and said, "Not on my bus. You couldn't have been." So, he lets her off and drives on. He comes to the next stop and another woman comes to the front to get off. She, too, looks at the bus driver and says, "I think I was just molested back there." Now the bus driver thinks that something has to be wrong, to get two complaints like this in one day is just unheard of. He gets up out of his seat and goes to the back of the bus. To his surprise there is a bald guy crawling on the floor on his hands and knees. The bus driver says, "Sir, what are you doing?" The man looks at him and says, "I lost my toupee. I thought I found it twice, but I lost it again."
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has 67.50 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, women
What's grosser than gross? Two vampires fighting over a bloody tampon. What's grosser than that? Finding a used condom on the bottom of a mayonnaise jar. What's grosser than that? When you open the refigerator and the rump rost farts in your face. You want to know what's grosser than that? When you sit on your grandpa's lap and he pops a boner. But the one thing that is grosser than that is when you are siting on your grandma's lap and she pops a boner.
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has 39.64 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What's pink and red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes.
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has 27.88 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby? Threesomes.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: disgusting