Joke #152

What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence? Divorced.
Vote:
has 40.53 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: divorce, women

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
Vote:
has 80.93 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: divorce, mean, men, money, women
2 girls meet: "Me & my husband are no longer together..." "Why?" "Well, could you live with a person who smokes weed, drinks, has no job and always cusses?" "No, of course I couldn't!" "Well he couldn't either!"
Vote:
has 80.46 % from 112 votes. More jokes about: divorce, husband, weed, women, work
These two guys had just gotten divorces and they swore they would never have anything to do with women again. They were best friends and they decided to move up to Alaska as far north as they could go and never look at a woman again. They got up there and went into a trader’s store and told him, "Give us enough supplies to last two men for one year." The trader got the gear together and on top of each one’s supplies he laid a board with a hole in it with fur around the hole. The guys said "What’s that board for?" The trader said, "Well, where you’re going there are no women and you might need this." They said "No way! We’ve sworn off women for life!" The trader said, "Well. take the boards with you, and if you don’t use them. I’ll refund your money next year." "Okay," they said and left. Next year this guy came into the trader’s store and said "Give me enough supplies to last one man for one year." The trader said, "Weren’t you in here last year with a partner?" "Yeah" said the guy. "Where is he?" asked the trader. "I shot him" said the guy. "Why?" "I caught him in bed with my board."
Vote:
has 78.83 % from 243 votes. More jokes about: divorce, geography, sex, travel, women
A woman finds out that her husband is cheating on her, so she decides to leave him a present. When he gets home, he finds an empty house, a bowl of cookies, and a video. He scarfs down the cookies, and pops in the video. On TV, he sees his wife sucking his best friend's d**k. He comes in her mouth, and she immediately spits the jizz into a bowl of cookie dough. Then she turns to the camera. "Oh, hello, I want a divorce."
Vote:
has 60.67 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, divorce, food, husband, women
Miss DeAngelo was a not-too-bright young woman who had moved to Hollywood with dreams of becoming a star. She didn’t find fame or glory, but she did encounter plenty of men willing to enjoy her plentiful charms, and soon she found herself called to testify in a divorce case. When it was her turn on the stand, the lawyer came forward. "Miss DeAngelo, the wife of the defendant has identified you as the ‘other woman’ in her husband’s life. Now, do you admit that you went to the Pricerite Motel with this Mr. Evans?" "Well, yes," acknowledged Miss DeAngelo with a sniff, "but I couldn’t help it." "Couldn’t help it?" asked the lawyer derisively. "How’s that?" "Mr. Evans deceived me." "Exactly what do you mean?" "See, when we signed in," she explained, "he told the motel clerk I was his wife."
Vote:
has 49.36 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, divorce, marriage, wife, women
Question: What do you call a woman who has lost 95 percent of her intelligence? Answer: Divorced.
Vote:
has 29.51 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: divorce, women
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Vote:
has 85.35 % from 580 votes. More jokes about: marriage, men, women
Two men are discussing their lives. One says, "I’m getting married. I’m tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear." The other one says, "I’m getting divorced for the same reasons."
Vote:
has 54.04 % from 129 votes. More jokes about: divorce, marriage
This morning I was beaten up by a busty woman in an elevator. I was staring at boobs and she said "Press One?" So I did... I don't remember much after that.
Vote:
has 84.73 % from 325 votes. More jokes about: sex, women
Question: What should a man do if his wife runs into the room during a baseball match and keeps disturbing you? Answer: Shorten the chain.
Vote:
has 62.79 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: black humor, sport, wife, women