# Joke #1522

If you had a million dollars and gave away one quarter, and another quarter, and then another quarter, how much would you have left? A million dollars minus 75 cents.
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"If you had a dollar," quizzed the teacher, "and you asked your father for another dollar and fifty cents, how much money would you have?" "One dollar." answered little Johnny. "You don't know your basic math." said the teacher shaking her head, disappointed. Little Johnny shook his head too, "You don't know my daddy."
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A businessman was confused about a bill he had received, so he asked his secretary for some mathematical help. "If I were to give you \$20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" he asked her. The secretary replied, "Everything but my earrings."
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Johnny, if you had 5\$ and you asked your father for 3\$ more, how many dollars would you have? I would have five dollars... You don't know your arithmetic, Johnny... You don't know my father, Mrs. Mutch...
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There was a blonde who was at an all blonde football game. At halftime she was called down to answer questions to see if she could win \$1000. The first question was what is 10 plus 11? She hesitates and says, "hm.. 5!" The host says "No, I'm sorry thats incorrect." All of the blondes in the stadium chanted "Give her another chance, give her another chance!" So the host agrees and said, "Ok how about 5 plus 5." She answers and says "20". Again all the blondes chanted "Give her another chance, give her another chance." So the host agrees again and says, "OK, last chance, what is 2 plus 2." The blonde says "4!" and the audience says "Give her another chance give her another chance!"
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Little Johnny was in Maths class when his teacher asked him: "Johnny, if your Mother had to repay a loan of \$100,000, and you gave her \$50,000, what would she need to repay the loan?" Johnny replied, "To repay the loan? \$50,000 more. To stay alive? CPR."
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We were so poor the only way I could afford to get my suit pressed was to ride the subway during rush hour.
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