Joke #4800

What happened to the plant in math class? It grew square roots.
Vote: has 64.90 % from 83 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

The teacher asked little Johnny, “What’s two and two?”. He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, “Four, teacher?”. She said, ” Yes, that’s right, but you counted on your fingers. Put your hands behind behind your back and tell me what’s three and three”. He put his hands behind his back, fumbled around, and answered, “Six, teacher?”. She said, “Yes, that’s right, but you’re still counting on your fingers. Put your hands in your pockets and tell me what’s five and five”. He put his hands in his pockets, fumbled around, and replied, “Eleven, teacher?”.
Vote: has 76.13 % from 210 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, math, teacher, time
Q: How do mathematicians induce good behavior in their children? A: "If I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times..."
Vote: has 65.55 % from 68 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
Little Johnny was in Maths class when his teacher asked him: "Johnny, if your Mother had to repay a loan of \$100,000, and you gave her \$50,000, what would she need to repay the loan?" Johnny replied, "To repay the loan? \$50,000 more. To stay alive? CPR."
Vote: has 60.15 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, little Johnny, math, money, vulgar
Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
Vote: has 56.98 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris, math, science
Zenophobia: the irrational fear of convergent sequences.
Vote: has 42.13 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
What did one math book say to the other math book? "I don't know about you man, but I got a lot of problems!"
Vote: has 58.26 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
How does a cow do math? With a cowculator.
Vote: has 45.82 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, math
Three men, a philosopher, a mathematician and an idiot, were out riding in the car when it crashed into a tree. Before anyone knows it, the three men found themselves standing before the pearly gates of Heaven, where St. Peter and the Devil were standing nearby. "Gentlemen," the Devil started, "Due to the fact that Heaven is now overcrowded, St. Peter has agreed to limit the number of people entering Heaven. If anyone of you can ask me a question which I don't know or cannot answer, then you're worthy enough to go to Heaven; if not, then you'll come with me to Hell." The philosopher then stepped up, "OK, give me the most comprehensive report on Socrates' Socrates' teachings." With a snap of his finger, a stack of paper appeared next to the Devil. The philosopher read it and concluded it was correct. "Then, go to Hell!" With another snap of his finger, the philsopher disappeared. The mathematician then asked,"Give me the most complicated formula ever theorized!" With a snap of his finger, another stack of paper appeared next to the Devil. The mathematician read it and reluctantly agreed it was correct. "Then, go to Hell!" With another snap of his finger, the mathematician disappeared too. The idiot then stepped forward and said, "Bring me a chair!" The Devil brought forward a chair. "Drill 7 holes on the seat." The Devil did just that. The idiot then sat on the chair and let out a very loud fart. Standing up, he asked, "Which hole did my fart come out from?" The Devil inspected the seat and said,"The third hole from the right." "Wrong," said the idiot, "it's from my asshole." And the idiot went to heaven.
Vote: has 86.69 % from 2155 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, god, heaven, life, math
Teacher: "Who knows 5+5=?" Little Johnny: "11" Teacher: "Take out your hand from trousers pocket and count with your fingers."
Vote: has 83.06 % from 87 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, math, stupid, teacher
Q. What mode do you use in maths? A. Multi-plyers.
Vote: has 32.82 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math