Q: Why Are black peoples hands and feet white?
A: When God painted them he told them to assume the position
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Black preacher is driving home from church and sees the white preacher walking down the road.
He reluctantly pulls over to offer him a ride.
A short distance along the way the whit guy says " you people don't actually think Jesus was black do you?" "And what makes think he's not?"
The black pastor snaps back.
The conversation becomes so heated less than needed attention was paid to the road and both men died in a trgic head on collision.
When st. Peter opened the pearly gates to heaven before them, there stood Jesus Christ himself.
He spread his arms slowly in a welcoming gesture and said "Buenos dias amigos!"
What did God say when he made the first niggers?
Oops! Burnt another one!
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Q: Why do blacks have flat noses?
A: That's where God put his foot when he pulled off their tails.
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A very successful lawyer parked his brand new Lexus in front of the office, ready to show it off to his colleagues.
As he opened the door a truck came roaring past and completely tore off the driver’s door of the Lexus.
The lawyer immediately grabbed his cell phone and dialed 911.
When a policeman arrived, the lawyer was still screaming hysterically.
His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter how the body shop tried to make it new again.
After the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting, the cop shook his head in disgust.
"I can’t believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don’t notice anything else." "How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.
The cop replied, "Didn’t you notice that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."
The lawyer looked down to his left side and let out a terrible scream: "Oh my God!… MY ROLEX!"
Yo' Mama so fat, I can stand on her belly and high-five God.
A college Professor, an avowed Atheist, was teaching his class.
He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated he was going to prove there is no God.
Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you 15 minutes!"
The lecture room fell silent.
You could have heard a pin drop.
Ten minutes went by.
Again the Professor taunted God, saying, "Here I am, God! I'm still waiting!"
His count-down got down to the last couple of minutes when a Marine, just released from active duty and newly registered in the class, walked up to the Professor and punched him full-force in the face.
The Professor tumbled from his lofty platform, and he was out cold before he hit the floor.
At first the students were shocked, and they babbled in confusion.
The young Marine took a seat in the front row and sat silently.
The class fell silent... waiting.
Eventually, the Professor came to.
When he finally regained the power of speech, he glared at the young Marine in the front row.
"What's the matter with you? Why on earth did you do that?"
The Marine smiled. "God was busy. He sent me."
What do the KKK and Nike have in common?
They both make a nigga run faster.
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Q: What does the devil do to black babies?
A: Nothing they're already burned.
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What's the difference between Batman and a Black man?
Batman can go to the store without robin.
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A deer hunter who was an atheist was out in the woods when suddenly a 1,000-pound deer stepped out.
"Good God!" exclaimed the hunter.
Suddenly, a voice from Heaven said, "I thought you don't believe in me."
The hunter replied, "Up until now I didn't believe in 1,000-pound deer either."
