Joke #1741

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An Investigator

Q: What happened when the owl lost his voice? A: He didn't give a hoot!

Q: What creature has more lives than a cat? A: A frog, after all, they croak every night.

A man meets a gorgeous woman in a bar. They talk, they connect, and they end up leaving together. They get back to her place, and as she shows him around, he notices that her bedroom is completely packed with teddy bears. Hundreds of small bears are on a shelf all the way along the floor, medium sized ones are on a shelf a little higher, and huge bears are on the top shelf along the wall. The man is kind of surprised by the collection, especially because it’s so extensive, but he decides not to mention this to her. She turns to him…they kiss…then they rip each other’s clothes off and romp around the room all night. After an intense night of passion, as they are lying there together in the afterglow, the man rolls over and asks, smiling, “Well, how’d I do?” The woman says, “You can have any prize from the bottom shelf.”

Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.

One day a traveling salesman was driving down a back country road at about 30 mph when he noticed that there was a three-legged chicken running alongside his car. He stepped on the gas but at 50 miles per hour. The chicken was still keeping up. After about a mile of running the chicken ran up a farm lane and into a barn behind an old farm house. The salesman had some time to kill so he turned around and drove up the farm lane. He knocked at the door and when the farmer answered he told him what he had just seen. The farmer said that he was a geneticist and had developed this breed of chicken because he, his wife and his son each like a drumstick when they have chicken and this way they only have to kill one chicken. "That"s the most fantastic thing I've ever heard," said the salesman. "How do they taste?" "I don't know," said the farmer. "We've never caught one."

What's wet and wiggly and says how do you do sixteen times? Two octopuses shaking hands.

What do you get if you cross a skunk and a dinosaur? A stinkasaurus.

Q: What's gray on the inside and clear on the outside? A: An elephant in a plastic bag.

Yo mama so stupid that she mourned wen we slaughtered a goat for Cristmas.

Question: Why does Tigger smell? Answer: You'd smell too if you played with Pooh all day!