Joke #1741

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An Investigator
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has 44.47 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal

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You're riding a horse full speed, there's a giraffe beside you, and you're being chase by a lion. What do you do? Get your drunk ass off the carousel.
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Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
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Q: Why doesn't Tigger have any friends? A: He plays with Pooh.
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A man sat at a local bar and said, "This is a special day, I'm celebrating." "What a coincidence," said the woman next to him. I'm celebrating, too" she replied, clinking glasses with him. "What are your celebrating?" "I'm a chicken farmer, and for years all my hens were infertile, but today they're finally fertile." "What a coincidence, the woman said. For my husband and I have been trying to have a child. Today, my gynecologist told me I'm pregnant! How did your chickens become fertile?" she asked. "I switched cocks," he replied. "What a coincidence," she said.
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has 73.31 % from 85 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, husband
What did the magician say when he made his rabbit disappear? Hare today, gone tomorrow.
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal
A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal
A dog walks into a pub, and takes a seat. He says to the barman, "Can I have a pint of lager and a packet of crisps please". The barman says, "Wow, that's amazing! You should join the circus!" The dog replies, "Why? Do they need electricians?"
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has 75.57 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: animal, bartender, dog
What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Spot.
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has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
Did you hear the joke about the skunk? Never mind, it stinks.
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has 44.46 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
A police station gets 2 new horses and 2 cops are assigned to be mounted policemen. They go on a ride and come back pleased. "This horse is great! From now on I'll always take this one" said the first cop. "My horse's great too. So I'll always take it" replied the second cop. "But how do we know which is which?" They though for a minute or two and one of them came up with an idea. "Lets cut off this ones tail" The other cop agreed and the horse lost it's tail. The next morning The police chief is standing infront of the horses and looks really mad. The two cops see this and ask whats wrong. "You two morons cut off the horses tail that's what's wrong!" "But otherwise we couldn't tell them apart." "Can't you see the black one is a bit taller then the brown one?!"
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has 69.30 % from 158 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop