Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest?
A: An Investigator
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Two drunks had just gotten thrown out of the bar and are walking down the street when they come across this dog, sitting on the curb, licking his balls.
They stand there watching and after a while one of them says, " I sure wish I could do that!"
The other one looks at him and says, "Well, I think I'd pet him first".
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
Q: Why are lawyers never attacked by sharks?
A: Professional courtesy.
What's the favourite flavour of sharks?
Shark-o-late.
Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree.
After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground.
After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts.
Finally, the female bird turned to her mate.
“Dear,” she chirped, “I think it’s time to tell him he’s adopted.”
Q: What do you call a black and white thing rolling down a hill
A: A maori and a segull fighting over a fishhead.
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What do you call it when one bull spies on another bull?
A steak-out.
What’s black and white and makes a lot of noise?
A zebra with a drum kit.
A plowhorse, a honeybee and an old geezer are debating about which of them is the greatest.
The horse says, "I can plow all day long to provide food for dozens of people!"
"
The bee says, "I pollinate all the plants every year and make honey besides!"
The old geezer says...
(We're waiting...)
Vote: