Two random variables were talking in a bar.
They thought they were being discrete but I heard their chatter continuously.
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An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar.
The first orders a beer, the second orders half a beer, the third orders a quarter of a beer, and so on.
After the seventh order, the bartender pours two beers and says, "You fellas ought to know your limits."
Infinity mathematicians came to bar.
First one ordered 1 glass of beer, second a half, third a quarter...
The barman interrupted them: "Assholes, here are 2 beers!"
So Descartes goes into a bar late one night for a beer.
At closing time, the bartender makes Last Call and asks him, "Get you another?"
Descartes replies, "I think not." And disappears.
It was just a simple misunderstanding, your Honour."
Testified the man charged with indecent exposure.
"Explain that statement!" demanded the Judge.
"Well, you see, this girl and I were drinking in a bar and she asked me what I wanted most in a woman... So I showed her."
I ordered a foot-long sandwich from a take-out restaurant and asked the clerk to cut it into fourths.
"I'm sorry, I can't," she said. "I already cut it in half."
A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.
The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers.
He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
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An Indian and an African walk into a bar...
Just jokin'.
It's just two liberal white women.
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Life is like a definite integral.
Integral from birthday to death ( LOVE ) dx = LIFE
Chuck Norris walks into a bar... the beer starts to run.
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