Q: What did one math book say to the other?
A: Don't bother me I've got my own problems! 
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Teacher: "Are you good at math?"
Pupil: "Yes and no."
Teacher: "What do you mean?"
Pupil: "Yes, I'm no good at math!"
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
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I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved.
One day, Little Johnny was with his father at home.
He asked: "What does "evolution" mean?"
His father replied, "Figure it out."
Next day, at school, during a math test, a boy raised his hand: "What's 289+308?"
The teacher said: "Figure it out."
Ten minutes later, Little Johnny looked at the boy and said: "Why don't you write "evolution"? Your teacher already told you!"
There is no logical foundation of mathematics, and Gödel has proved it!
Teacher: "How much is half of 8?"
Little Johnny: "Up and down or across?"
Teacher: "What do you mean?"
Little Johnny: "Well, up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0!"
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Q:What is the difference between a mathematician and a philosopher?
A: The mathematician only needs paper, pencil, and a trash bin for his work.
The philosopher can do without the trash bin.
Q:What do you get if you add two apples and three apples?
A:A high school math problem!
How the children from Chernobil count from one to hundred?
On the fingers!
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The teacher asks little Johnny if he knows his numbers.
"Yes," he says. "My daddy taught me."
"Can you tell me what comes after three?"
"Four," answers little Johnny.
"What comes after six?"
"Seven," answers little Johnny.
"Very good," says the teacher. "Your father did a very fine job.
What comes after ten?"
"A jack," answers little Johnny.
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