Joke #1839

fi yuo cna raed tihs whit no porlbem, yuo aer smrat. Shaer ti whit yuor fienrds.
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Q: Why was the black baby crying? A: He had diarea and thought he was melting.
Vote: has 33.60 % from 57 votes. Send joke:

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A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, "Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your trouble to bed with you." "I know," said the man, "but I can’t. My wife refuses to sleep alone."
Vote: has 52.05 % from 96 votes. Send joke:

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The wife told me to talk to her like she was special the other day. So I said, "gooooo ... annddd ... makkee ... meeee ... a ... cuuuppp ... offffff ... coofffeeeeeee ..."
Vote: has 39.50 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

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The husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months yet the wife stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came back to his senses, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business fell, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. When I think about it now. ....I think you bring me bad luck!"
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A man walks into the doctors and the doctor says, "I've not seen you for a while." The man replies, "Yes, I've been ill."
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AIDS Can't Kill Chuck Norris.
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How did the tugboat get AIDS? It was rear-ended by a ferry.
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Two cows were chatting over the fence between their fields. The first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm."  The other cow replied, "Hell, I ain't worried, it won't affect us ducks."
Vote: has 75.00 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

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A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
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There are two cows in a field. One says to the other: "So what do you think of mad cow disease?" The other replies: "I don't know, I'm a chicken!"
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