Joke #1861

What fits your schedule better...... Exercising 1 hour a day or being fat 24 hours a day?

Yo mama so fat it took nationwide 3 years to get on her side.

Yo mama so fat when she tossed in her sleep she woke up in another time zone.

I spotted several pairs of men's Levi's at a garage sale. They were sizes 30, 31, and 32, but I was looking for size 33. So I asked the owner if he had a pair. He shook his head. "I'm still wearing the 33s," he said. "Come back next year."

Yo mama so fat she needed two wrist watches cause shes in two time zones.

Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.

Yo mama is so fat it took her three whole months to get through a door.

"Yo momma so fat she stands in two time zones!"

Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.

A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house. Exhausted from the afternoon's activities, they fell asleep and awoke at around 8 p.m. As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied and he slipped into his shoes and drove home. "Where have you been?" demanded his wife when he entered the house. "Darling," replied the man, "I can't lie to you. I've been having an affair with my secretary. I fell asleep in her bed and didn't wake up until eight o'clock." The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, "You liar! You've been playing golf!"

Yo Mommas so fat it took me a bus and two trains just to get on her good side.