Joke #3560

Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.
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has 43.21 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, fat, technology, time, Yo mama

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One day a man, who had been stranded on a desert island for over ten years sees an unusual speck on the horizon. "It's certainly not a ship", he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft. Suddenly, emerging from the surf, comes a drop dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear. She approaches the stunned guy and says: "Tell me, how long has it been since you've had a cigarette?" "Ten years," replies the stunned man. With that she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says: "Man, oh man! Is that good!" "And how long has it been since you've had a sip of bourbon?" she asks him. Trembling the castaway replies: "Ten years." She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and hands it to him. He opens the flask, takes a long swig and says: "WOW, that's absolutely fantastic!" At this point she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man seductively, and asks: "And how long has it been since you've had some real fun?" With tears in his eyes, the guy falls to his knees and sobs: "Oh good Lord! Don't tell me you've got a laptop?"
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Yo mamma so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.
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Yo mamas so fat that when she stepped on a scale, buzz lightyear came out and said "to infinity and beyond!"
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yo momas so stupid when theives broke into her house and stole the TV she chased after them shouting ''wait you forgot the remote''.
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Yo momma so fat when she goes camping the bears hide their food.
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Yo mama's so fat when she stepped on a scale it said: "A.B.C.D.E.F.G get your fat ass off of me."
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Yo momma so fat when she went to the circus the little girl asked if she could ride the elephant.
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