Q: What's the difference between an in-law and an outlaw?
A: Outlaws are wanted.
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A Georgian man sits in the dock at the court, with his neck bended down.
The judge: "Why did you rape the girl?"
"I liked her."
"Why did you raped the boy?"
"I liked him."
"Sir, why don't you look to my eyes when you talk to me?"
"I'm afraid I'll like you…"
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What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.
What would you do if your were in a large room, all sealed up, no windows, the door was locked, and there were 5 hungry tigers, 32 vultures, 17 spitting cobras, 213 tarantulas, 1 laywer, and you had a gun with only two bullets?
Shoot the lawyer twice.
How are a lawyer and a prostitute different?
The prostitute stops fucking you after you’re dead.
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A man took a trip out West after a harrowing divorce proceeding.
He stopped in a bar, and after a few drinks, stated to no one in particular, "Lawyers are horses' asses."
One of the locals spoke up on hearing this: "Mister, you'd better watch what you say. You're in horse country."
Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?
New Jersey got to pick first.
How come sharks don’t attack lawyers?
From professional courtesy.
Q: How many lawyers does it take to build a wall?
A: Depends on how deep you stack them.
A lawyer and a basketball player want to make a deal.
Suggest a place where both of them would be happy to meet.
Of course, they should at the court.
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