Joke #2251

"There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works."
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has 55.51 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: women

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How many women does it take to change a light bulb? 11 - 10 to form a committee and 1 to get her boyfriend to do it...
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has 36.08 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: women
A woman meets with her lover, who is also her husband's best friend. They make love for hours. Afterwards, as they lie in bed, the phone rings. Since it's the woman's house, she picks up the receiver. The best friend listens, only hearing her side of the conversation: "Hello? Oh, hi... I'm so glad that you called... Really? That's wonderful... Well, I'm happy to hear you're having such a great time... Oh, that sounds terrific... Love you, too. OK. Bye-bye." She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, "Who was that?" "Oh," she replies, "That was my husband telling me about the wonderful time he's having on his fishing trip with you."
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has 61.05 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: fish, husband, love, marriage, women
Seven days on a honeymoon make one hole weak.
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has 73.64 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: holiday, women
Question: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? Answer: The dog, because he’ll shut up after you let him in.
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has 48.41 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dog, wife, women
Q: Do you know what 69 is? A: It's a good thing screwed up by a period.
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has 36.10 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, women
Q: What do you call a women who does as much work as a man? A: A lazy b*tch.
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has 46.20 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: women, work
Two police officers saw an old woman staggering out a local bar, stopping her they can tell she has had far too much to drink and instead of taking her to jail they decide to just drive her home. They loaded her into the police cruiser one of the officers gets in the back with the drunk woman. As they drove through the streets they kept asking the old woman where she lived, all the old lady would say as she stroked the officers arm is, "You're Passionate." They drove awhile longer and asked again, but again the same response as she stroked his arm, "You're Passionate." The officers were getting a little upset so they stopped the car and said to the woman, "Look we have driven around this city for two hours and you still haven't told us where you live!" She replied, "I keep trying to tell you, you're passin it!"
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has 71.40 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: age, bar, cop, old people, women
Q: Why do women have tiny feet? A: So they can stand closer to the sink.
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has 32.63 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: women
Woman 1: Oh! You got a haircut! That’s so cute! Woman 2: Do you think so? I wasn’t sure when she was gave me the mirror. I mean, you don’t think it’s too fluffy looking? Woman 1: Oh God no! No, it’s perfect. I’d love to get my hair cut like that, but I think my face is too wide. I’m pretty much stuck with this stuff I think. Woman 2: Are you serious? I think your face is adorable. And you could easily get one of those layer cuts – that would look so cute I think. I was actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long neck. Woman 1: Oh – that’s funny! I would love to have your neck! Anything to take attention away from this two-by-four I have for a shoulder line. Woman 2: Are you kidding? I know girls that would love to have your shoulders. Everything drapes so well on you. I mean, look at my arms – see how short they are? If I had your shoulders I could get clothes to fit me so much easier. Man 1: Haircut? Man 2: Yeah.
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has 82.77 % from 155 votes. More jokes about: women
Should women have children after 35? "No, 35 children are enough!"
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has 65.66 % from 413 votes. More jokes about: age, kids, women