Joke #2333

How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant? He forgot to wrap his whopper.
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Sex is like math: Add the bed Subtract the clothes Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply
Vote: has 85.49 % from 1629 votes. Send joke:

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What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from Grandma have in common? You don't look down.
Vote: has 66.75 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

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A lady puts an ad in the paper that reads: "Recently single and looking for a man that will not run away, not hit me and treat me right in the bedroom." One day her door bell rings and there is a man with no arms and no legs at the door. He says: "I am here to answer your ad in the paper. I have no arms so I will not hit you and no legs so I cannot run away." She says: "What about the good in bed part?" He says: "How do you think I rang the doorbell?"
Vote: has 58.77 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

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Friend: Dude, I can't stop dreaming about my crush. Me: Well imagine this... You're home alone, and your crush comes over to visit. Friend: Ok I can see it... Me: She walks into your room and you're just sitting there. Friend: Uh-huh.. I'm likin' this. Me: Ok. So she walks in front of you, takes her pants off. She's not wearing any underwear.. And then she sits on you. Friend: Oh-ho-hoo.. Whatta' naughty girl. Me: Yeah, ok. Don't get dirty on me. So she's sitting on you. And then... she starting shitting in you. Right then and there, you find out you're a toilet. Friend: I hate you...
Vote: has 69.67 % from 138 votes. Send joke:

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Pr*stitute in the police station. The desk officer sayes "so when did you realise you were raped ?" She replies ... "when the cheque bounced !"
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What's the rudest type of Elf? The GofuckyoursElf.
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Hey babe, I'd like to take it your rack! High five!
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A couple driving home hit and wounded a skunk on the road. The wife gets out and brings it back to the car. "We need to take it to a vet. Its shivering, it must be cold, what should I do?" she asks. Husband replies "Put it between your legs to keep it warm." "But it stinks!" she exclaims. "So hold its nose!"
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A woman wants everything from one man. A man wants one thing from all the women.
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An ugly bloke walks into a pub with a huge grin on his face. "What are you so happy about ?" asks the landlord. "Well, I live by the railway and on my way home last night I noticed a woman tied to the tracks. I cut her free and we shagged all night !" "Did you get a blow job ?" asks the landlord. "No ..." he says, "I never found the head."
Vote: has 71.05 % from 94 votes. Send joke:

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