Joke #2342

Q. Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe? A. They're called Dikes. They have an extra long tongue and only take one finger to get off!

The lesbians next door bought me a Rolex for my birthday. I think they misunderstood when I said I wanna watch...

A woman was suspicious in the loyalty of her husband for a long time and she decided to make him jealous. "My love, what would you say if I was having sex with your best friend?" "I'd say you're a lesbian!"

Lesbians can also take Viagra. They don't have to swallow it, they just let it melt in their tongues.

Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period? A. Finger painting.

What do you call an open can of tuna in a lesbians apartment? Potpourri.

Q: How can you tell if a lesbian is butch? A: She kick starts her vibrator and rolls her own tampons.

A man has came over to his wife in a request. She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants. 3 hours later he is fucking hookers and watching football and porn with friend.

GOD said, “Adam, I want you to do something for me.” “Gladly, Lord,” replied Adam. “What do you want me to do?” “Go down into the valley.” “What’s a valley?” asked Adam. God explained to him, then said, Cross the river.” “What’s a river?” God explained it to him, and then continued, “Go over the hill…”. “What’s a hill?” God explained to Adam what a hill was, then said, “On the other side of the hill, you will find a cave.” “What’s a cave?” After God explained, he said, “In the cave you will find a woman.” Adam asked, “What’s a woman?” So God explained that to him too. He continued, “I want you to reproduce.” “How do I do that?” “Jeez,” God muttered under his breath. He then sighed and explained the birds and the bees to Adam. He liked that concept very much, so he went down into the valley, across the river, over the hill and into the cave where he found a woman.” A little while later, Adam returned and asked God, “What’s a headache?”

Masturbation is like procrastination, it’s all good and fun until you realize you are only fucking yourself!

What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? See ya next month.