What do you call a frog with no legs? It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.
How do you f*ck a fat chick? Roll her in flour and find the wet spot.
What did Cinderella Dolphin where to the ball? Glass flippers.
Your house is so dirty I saw rats on dirt bikes.
A salesman is talking to a farmer when he looks over and sees a rooster wearing pants, a shirt, and suspenders. He says, “What the hell is that all about?” The farmer says, “We had a fire in the chicken coop and all his feathers got singed off, so the wife made him some clothes to keep him warm. There ain’t nothing funnier than watching him try to hold down a hen with one foot and get his pants down with the other.”
Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other "Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?" The other one says "No, It doesn't worry me, I'm a horse!"
Why don't cows ever have any money? Because the farmers milk them dry.
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.
What weighs 35 tons, has four fuzzy ears and is 80 million years old? Two rabbits riding a brontosaurus.