Joke #2398

Why did the gag-writer turn green? Cause the gag-writer was sick of writing frog jokes!

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.

Whats the difference in a seagull and a babys diaper? A seagull flits across the shore and a baby shits across the floor.

A blonde is driving down the road and she sees a dead rabbit. She stops the car and called out, "Does anybody got any hairspray!?" A man pulls up and gives her a bottle of spray and she sprays it on the dead rabbit and the man stares and says "Why u doing that?" The blonde says "Hairspray is for dead hairs"

what is the diffrent between a chicken and a prostute chicken goes cockadoodle do prostute goes any cock will do.

There are two cows in a field. One says to the other: "So what do you think of mad cow disease?" The other replies: "I don't know, I'm a chicken!"

The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Q: What happened when the owl lost his voice? A: He didn't give a hoot!

Q. How does a frog confuse you? A. When he comes out and says he needed that nap and feels much better.

A guy goes into an antique shop. He's browsing around the shop and comes across a brass rat. He picks up the rat and is looking at it when the shop owner approaches him. He asks the owner how much the Brass Rat is. The shop owner says $20 For the rat and $10 for the story behind it. The customers say I don't need to know the story but I'll buy the rat. So he pays for the rat and leaves the shop. After about 50 yards he hears a Wierd noise behind him and so looks around. There's a bunch of rats following him so he picks up the pace a walks faster but the noise gets louder. He glances behind and there are hundreds of rats following him so he starts to run. Still, the noise gets louder and there are thousands of rats chasing him. He comes to a bridge over the river and thinks the rats are chasing him because of the Brass Rat, he has so he throws the rat as far as he can into the river. All the rats that were chasing him then all jump into the river and drown. The guy thinks for a while and then walks back to the shop. As he enters the shop the owner who saw him coming said I bet you came back for the story behind the Brass Rat did you? The customer says no I didn't. Have you got a brass Nigger?

A fellow always wanted to own a pet skunk, so in the dead of winter, he took his girlfriend with him to go hunting for one. After a bit of waiting, they bagged a skunk and brought him back to the truck. The skunk was very scared and very cold, so the guy asks his girlfriend if she can keep the skunk between her legs to keep him warm. "But what about the smell?" asks his girlfriend. "Oh, he'll get used to it, just like I did."