Which is the most dangerous animal in the Northern Hemisphere?
Yak the Ripper.
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What does an octopus wear on a cold day?
A coat of arms.
What do you call a gigantic polar bear?
Nothing, you just run away.
A dog with three legs walks into a Wild West bar and says, ‘I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.’
A family is driving in their car on a holiday.
A frog crosses the road and the husband, who is driving, is able to stop the car.
He gets out an takes the frog and carries him to the side of the road.
Frog is grateful, thanks the man, and tells him that he will grant him a wish.
Man says: please make my dog win the next dog race.
Frog asks to look at the dog which jumps out of the car.
The frog notices that the dog has only got three legs and tells the man that he thinks it is almost impossible to fulfill his wish and asks that the man will tell him another wish.
The man says: "Well, then please help that my wife will win the next beauty contest in the area."
Frog asks him to tell his wife to get out of the car.
Wife comes out of the car and approaches the frog.
The frog turns to the man and says: "Could I please have another look at the dog?"
How do you know when there's a rabbit in your bed?
You can smell the carrots on his breath.
Q: What's gray on the inside and clear on the outside?
A: An elephant in a plastic bag.
Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors?
Because, if it had 4 doors it would be chicken sedan.
One day little Johnny was digging a hole in his back yard.
The next-door neighbor spotted him and decided to investigate.
"Hello Johnny, what are you up to?" he asked.
"My goldfish died and I'm gonna bury him," Johnny replied.
"That's a really big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" asked the neighbor.
"That's because he's inside your cat!"
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Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
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