Which is the most dangerous animal in the Northern Hemisphere?
Yak the Ripper.
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Q: Why do hippos have to have sex in water?
A: Ever try to keep two tons of pussy wet?
Q: What's invisible and smells like carrots?
A: Bunny farts!
Q: What do you call a horse that plays the violin in a musical?
A: Fiddler on the hoof.
Chuck Norris won the Kentucky derby, on a Unicorn.
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What's the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper !
A man goes to the circus. After the show he speaks to the manager and asks for a job.
"Alright, what can you do?", the manager asks.
"I can do great bird impressions", the man replies.
"Pssh, a lot of people can do that".
"Oh well", the man says and flies away.
Q:Why did the cow cross the road?
A:To go to the moo-vies.
Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A: Laughing stock.
Why is a reindeer like a gossip?
Because they are both tail bearers.
A cowboy rode up to the saloon, dismounted from his horse, and dusted himself off.
He then walked around to the rear of his horse, lifted the tail and kissed it right on the rectum.
As the cowboy walked into the saloon, the shocked barkeeper asked, "Did you just kiss your horse's butt?"
The cowboy said, "Sure, I've got chapped lips."
The stunned barkeep asked if this was an old Indian cure.
The cowboy said, "Nope.
But, sure as s**t, it keeps me from licking my lips!"