Why do zebras have stripes?
Because the spots where all over.
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As horses say to one another.
Any friend of yours is a palomino!
What is the most famous shark?
William Sharkspeare.
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat.
He came across two men.
One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter.
The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him.
Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.
A guy walks into a bar with a giraffe, and the giraffe gets waay too drunk.
The bartender says, "Hey! you can't leave that lyin' there!"
The guy goes, "that's not a lion its a giraffe!"
Usain Bolt is so fast I saw a Cheetah giving him a High 5.
A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland.
As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used.
She showed the group a lively hillside where many goats were grazing.
"These," she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce."
She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?"
A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!"
How come sharks don’t attack lawyers?
From professional courtesy.
''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''