Joke #2361

How do you confuse a frog? Put it in a round bowl and tell it to take a nap in the corner.
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has 31.56 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What's a rabbits favorite movie? Rabbits of the Lost Ark.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
Jim and Lena were driving around the countryside when they ran over a skunk. "We better take the skunk to the vet, Lena. Just put the skunk between your legs to keep it warm." "But, Jim, what about the smell?" "Don't worry, Lena. The skunk will get used to it."
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has 79.43 % from 234 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, doctor
Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say: "Jesus is watching you!" Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again. "Jesus is watching you," the voice boomed again. The burglar stopped again. He was frightened. Frantically, he looked all around. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot. The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, then he asked the parrot: "What's your name?" "Clarence," said the bird. "That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burglar. "What idiot named you Clarence?" The parrot said, "The same idiot who named the Rottweiller, Jesus."
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has 78.03 % from 188 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot
What did the lions say to his cubs when he taught them to hunt? Don't go over the road till you see the zebra crossing.
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
One day little Bill was playing in the sand out of the sun underneath his front steps. Soon his mother walked up the steps without underwear due to the heat of the day and little Bill looked up and yelled out, ''Mother, what's that black thing that you're carrying under your dress?'' ''Don't worry, Bill, it's just a squirrel,'' she said. So little Bill kept on playing, and soon his grandmother came along, also without underwear, and little Bill looked up and said, ''Grammie what is that hairy animal under your dress?'' ''Ah, it's a squirrel,'' she answered. So little Bill asked his grandmother, ''Why is it that your squirrel is grey intead of black?'' The grandmother replied, ''If your mother's squirrel had popped the nuts that this one has popped, it would be gray too.''
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has 29.01 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey. The country there now is only an impostor.
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has 50.29 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
There was once a man from the city who was visiting a small farm, and during this visit he saw a farmer feeding pigs in a most extraordinary manner. The farmer would lift a pig up to a nearby apple tree, and the pig would eat the apples off the tree directly. The farmer would move the pig from one apple to another until the pig was satisfied, then he would start again with another pig. The city man watched this activity for some time with great astonishment. Finally, he could not resist saying to the farmer, “This is the most inefficient method of feeding pigs that I can imagine. Just think of the time that would be saved if you simply shook the apples off the tree and let the pigs eat them from the ground!” The farmer looked puzzled and replied, “What’s time to a pig?”
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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has 43.40 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit? The first herd shot round the world.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why is the camel called the ship of the desert? A: Because it's full of Arab semen.
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has 55.44 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, dirty, geography