Joke #5708

Q:Why do dogs stick their noses in women's crotches? A:Because they can.
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Dam.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?" The bartender considers it, then agrees. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues. After the man finished his drink, he asked the bartender, "If I show you an even better trick, will you give me free drinks for the rest of the evening?" The bartender agrees, thinking that no trick could possibly be better than the first. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues. The man reaches into another pocket and pulls out a small bullfrog, who begins to sing along with the rat's music. While the man is enjoying his beverages, a stranger confronts him and offers him $100,000.00 for the bullfrog. "Sorry," the man replies, "he's not for sale." The stranger increases the offer to $250,000.00 cash up front. "No," he insists, "he's not for sale." The stranger again increases the offer, this time to $500,000.00 cash. The man finally agrees, and turns the frog over to the stranger in exchange for the money. "Are you insane?" the bartender demanded. "That frog could have been worth millions to you, and you let him go for a mere $500,000!" "Don't worry about it." the man answered. "The frog was really nothing special. You see, the rat's a ventriloquist."
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has 81.62 % from 413 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, music
What should a rabbit use to keep his fur neat? A harebrush.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why do bunnies have soft sex? A: They have cotton balls.
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has 58.52 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, sex
What do you call a mobile homes for rabbits? Wheelburrows.
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
A guy asks his waiter at a restaurant how they prepare their chicken. The waiter goes blank for a second, then says, "Nothing special really... We just tell them they're going to die..."
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, death, food, time
Q: What did the emu say to the nurse? A: Mend her bones or walk the plank
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has 34.72 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, nurse
A man is walking home when he sees a dog buying meat for his owner. The man watches the dog when the butcher takes a little to much and growls and him until he gets the right amount. The man follows the dog and watches as the dog stands on two legs and helps an old lady across the street. Amazed the man follows the dog home and watches the dog ring the doorbell. When the owner comes to the door the owner takes the bags and tells the dog to stay in the front yard. Frustrated the man goes up to the owner and yells "This dog is amazing! He gets your groceries, makes sure you have the exact change, helps old ladies across the street and this is how you treat him!" The owner replies, "I know but,this is the 3rd time this week he left his keys".
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why do zebras have stripes? Because the spots where all over.
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has 13.56 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food