Joke #2492

The coach says to the boxer encouragement words: The other one will surely win, but at least look at the cameras and smile...

Three babies in the womb discuss what they would like to be when they grow up. The first one says, "I wanna be a plumber, so I can fix the pipes in here." The second one says, "I wanna be an electrician, so I can get some lights in here." The third one says, "I wanna be a boxer." The others look confused and ask, "Why do you want to be a boxer?" He proudly replies, "So I can beat the hell out of that rude bald guy who keeps coming in here and spitting on us."

Did you hear about the blonde who after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get taller girls?

Barcelona beats every team in the world, Chuck Norris can beat Barcelona... by himself.

What do you call an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court? Annette!

Q: What is better than winning a medal at the Para-olympics? A: Having two legs.

Chuck norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund

A blind man was describing his favorite sport - parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: "I am placed in the door and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me, and out I go." "But how do you know when you are going to land?" he was asked. "I have a very keen sense of smell and I can smell the trees and grass when I am 300 feet from the ground," he answered. But how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on the ground?" he was again asked. He quickly answered "Oh, the dog's leash goes slack."

The man says, "Will you buy booze?" The bum says, "No." The man says, "Will you gamble it away?" The bum says, "No." So the man says, "Will you come home with me so my wife can see what happens to a man who doesn't drink or gamble?"

Chuck Norris won the Boston marathon in New York.

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.