The mouse and the elephant stay on the trunk of a smitten tree. Near them passes the giraffe, who asks them: Who pulled out this tree from his root? Me off course, says the mouse, but the elephant helped a bit.
A Democrat walks into a doctor's office with a frog sitting on his head. The frog looks at the doctor and says, "Hey doc, can you get this wart off my ass?
How come sharks don’t attack lawyers? From professional courtesy.
Cats took many thousands of years to domesticate humans.
Q. What did one frog say to another? A. You're such a WART!
Q: What do you get if you cross a bear with a toilet? A: Winnie the Pooh.
Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat? A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer? A full bull.
Are shellfish warm? No they re clammy.
You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right? Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla". Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.
Why do cows like being told joke? Because they like being amoosed.