Joke #4926

Two snakes are talking. One of them turns to the other and asks, "Are we venomous?" The other replays, "Yes,why?..." "I just bit ma lip."
Vote:
has 57.16 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q: Where did the newlywed horses stay? A: In the bridle suite.
Vote:
has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a frog with no legs? It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.
Vote:
has 40.24 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal
Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
Vote:
has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a millionaire? A bunny with money.
Vote:
has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, money
Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet? It lives on ice.
Vote:
has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call rubber bumpers on yachts? Shark absorbers.
Vote:
has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What would you get if you cross a trumpet and a serpent? A: A snake in the brass.
Vote:
has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female Poodle. The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time. The males are speechless before her beauty, slobbering on themselves and hoping for just a glance from her in return. Aware of her charms and her obvious effect on the three suitors, she decides to be kind and tells them “The first one who can use the words “liver” and “cheese” together in an imaginative, intelligent sentence can go out with me.” The sturdy, muscular black Lab speaks up quickly and says “I love liver and cheese.” “Oh, how childish,” said the Poodle. “That shows no imagination or intelligence whatsoever.” She turned to the tall, shiny Golden Retriever and said “How well can you do?” “Ummmm...I HATE liver and cheese,” blurts the Golden Retriever. “My, my,” said the Poodle. “I guess it’s hopeless. That’s just as dumb as the Lab’s sentence.” She then turns to the last of the three dogs and says, “How about you, little guy?” The last of the three, tiny in stature but big in fame and finesse, is the Taco Bell chihuahua. He gives her a smile, a sly wink, turns to the Golden Retriever and the Lab and says... “Liver alone. Cheese mine."
Vote:
has 80.57 % from 294 votes. More jokes about: animal
George was taking care of a parrot for his aunt. This parrot was a very nasty parrot. It cussed and screamed and made fun of George, so he took the parrot and put it in the freezer. The parrot kept screaming and insulting George until finally it stopped. George thought to himself, “On no! I froze my aunt’s bird to death.” He opened the door and saw the bird alive! The bird said, “I’m sorry for my behaviour and will never act up again. George said, “Why the change?” The bird answered, “Because I saw what you did to the other bird."
Vote:
has 38.22 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, death, parrot
Chuck Norris once walked in the opposite direction in the Running of the Bulls. The bulls turned around and ran for their lives.
Vote:
has 58.18 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris