A man walked into a branch of the Antelope Valley Bank and handed a teller a note demanding money.
The man had one hand in his pocket, as if holding a gun, so the teller began handing over the contents of her cash drawer.
When she had forked over $7,000 the robber said, "That's enough" and walked out the door.
It's hard to find a bank robber who knows when he's had enough.
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‘The United States has developed a new weapon that destroys people but it leaves buildings standing.
It’s called the stock market.’
Jay Leno
Harry staggers exhausted into his house.
‘What’s wrong with you?’ asks his wife.
‘I thought I’d save my 75p bus fare by running behind the bus,’ gasps Harry.
‘You idiot,’ says his wife.
‘If you’d run home behind a taxi you could’ve saved a tenner.’
Doctor to woman: "What is the matter about your husband?"
Woman: "He is worrying about MONEY."
Doctor: "I think I can relieve him of that."
Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
Vote:
Yo mama so poor the i saw her rolling a can and said what are you doing she said moving!
A bill collector came to my house the other day, so I gave him a huge stack of old bills.
Yo' Mama is so poor, when she farts, her holey underwear whistles.
"Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Maryland State Lottery?
The winner gets $3 a year for a million years."
A guy takes his blonde girlfriend to a football game for the first time.
After the game he asked his girlfriend how she liked the game.
Oh, I really liked it, she said, but I just couldn't understand though why they were beating each other up for 25 cents.
Surprised, the boyfriend asked, what do you mean?
The blonde girlfriend replied all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!'