How can you tell if your wife is dead?
The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.
Q: Why do women wear makeup and perfume?
A: Because they're ugly and they stink.
A woman came home to find her retired husband waving a rolled up newspaper round his head.
'What are you doing dear?'
'Swatting flies - I got 3 males and 2 females'
'How do you know what sex they were?'
The man very confidently replied, "Easy - 3 were on the beer and 2 were on the phone."
Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I raped didn't stand a chance.
Vote:
Have you heard about the new super-sensitive condoms?
They hang around after the man leaves and talks to the woman.
There was an ad in the newspaper:
An agriculturist looks for a woman with a tractor.
The photo of the tractor is required.
Q: You know why women haven't landed on the moon?
A: Because there is no shopping centre.
Q. How are fat girls and mopeds alike?
A. They are fun to ride but you don't want your friends to find out.
Vote:
Q: Why did my wife cross the road?
A: To go back to the first shoe shop we went in three bloody hours ago.