Q. Where do polar bears vote?
A. The North Poll.
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When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears.
He had real bears.
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Why is a reindeer like a gossip?
Because they are both tail bearers.
Q: Why don't they let Blondes swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.
What do you get when you try to cross a pit bull with a computer?
A lot of bites.
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on top of a cliff.
A magical bird flies to them and tells them that each one of them can jump off the cliff and wish to be one thing to fly away on.
They will become that thing and can escape from their arduous situation.
The redhead goes first.
She jumps and says "eagle!".
She turns into an eagle and flies away.
The brunette jumps off and says,"hawk!" she turns into a hawk and flies away.
The blonde takes a running start, trips on a rock as she nears the edge. "Oh crap!" she yells.
Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
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What's the difference between a tiger and a lion?
A tiger has the mane part missing.
Two skunks were being chased by a bear.
As the bear got closer, one of the skunks said "Whatever shall we do?"
"Let us spray!" replied the other.
A scientist and a philosopher were being chased by a hungry lion.
The scientist made some quick calculations, he said “it’s no good trying to outrun it, its catching up”.
The philosopher kept a little ahead and replied “I am not trying to outrun the lion, I am trying to outrun you !”