What is the slowest racehorse in the world?
A clotheshorse.
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What do spiders like to order at a fast food restaurant?
Burgers and flies.
Q: Why are dogs such bad dancers?
A: They have two left feet.
Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.
What do cows usually fly around in?
Helicowpters and Bulloons.
How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
Marry it.
What did the cow wear to the football game?
A Jersey.
What do you call a bull that runs into a threshing machine?
Hamburger.
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.