Boy: “Isn’t the principal a dummy!” Girl: “Say, do you know who I am?” Boy: “No.” Girl: “I’m the principal’s daughter.” Boy: “And do you know who I am?” Girl: “No,” Boy: “Thank goodness!”
When you try to change a man, you basically undertake his mother’s role; And she made him eat spinach and study for school...
There was an employment advertisement in an office. So a guy went there. Managrer asked him: "Do you know what is the meaning of Ph.D.?" The guy answered: "Passed High school with Difficulties."
A mom calls out to her son "Harry! Wake up! You'll be late for school." The son replies, "Mom I don't want to go to school! The teachers and students hate me! Give me one reason I should go!" The mom says back, "You should go because you're the principal!"
A mother picked her son up from school and began to ask him about his day. “How do you like your new teacher,” she asked. “I don’t. She told me to sit in the front of the class for the present. But then she didn’t end up by giving me one!”
Billy and Willy were at Sunday school studying about Noah’s ark. On the way home, Willy asked, “Do you think Noah did much fishing?” “How could he?” said Billy. “He only had two worms”. The teacher is droning away in the classroom when he notices a student sleeping way up in the back row. The teacher shouts to the sleeping student’s neighbor, “Hey wake that student up!” The neighbor yells back, “You put him to sleep, you wake him up!”
Jane was sitting in anatomy class on day when her teacher asked her a question. He inquired, “What grows to 10 times its original size when excited?” Jane blushed and said that she didn't know. Jimmy raised his hand and said, “I know! The pupil of the eye.” The teacher replied, “Yes, very good Jimmy.” The the teacher turned to Jane and said, “Jane I have three things to say to you: One -- you have a very dirty mind. Two -- you haven't been studying hard enough. And three -- you're going to be very disappointed!”
Chuck Norris didn't go to school to learn, he went to teach.
One day a blonde came home from school and came to her mother and said, "Hey, Mommy! Mommy! Today in school we learned to count. The other kids could only count to three but I can count to Ten..... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!" The mother responds, "Very good honey." The blonde asks, "Is that because I'm a blonde mommy?" And the mother responds, "Yes dear." Next day the blonde came home and went to her mother and said, "Today in school we learned our ABCs! The other kids could only get to D but I can get to K! .... A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K!" The mother says, "Very good honey." The blonde then asked. "Is that because I'm a blonde, Mommy?" The mother responds, "Yes dear." The third day the blonde come home from school and said to her mother, "Mommy today in school we went swimming! But I was the only one who had breasts. Is that because I'm a blonde, Mommy?" And the mother responds, "No Honey, it's because you're twenty five."
One day two girls were trying out for the school cheerleading squad. One was a blonde and one was a brunette. After they both had tryouts, they went home to wait until the results were posted. The blonde goes to see if she made it that night. Once she found out she made it she got out her cell phone and called the brunette, but she didn't answer, so the blonde just went back home. The next day the brunette called the blonde to see if she wanted to go with her to look at their scores. The blonde says sure and meets the brunette at the school. The brunette beats the blonde to the school, so she goes ahead and looks at the scores to find out they both made it. When the blonde gets there, she finds her name on the list again. Then she says, "Yes! I made it again, I made it last night and I made it again today. I am on a roll!"
A student visits the principal's office The principal asks: "What is your name?" The student replies: "D-d-d-dav-dav-david." The principal asks: "Do you have a stutter?" Student answers: "No, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was an asshole."